I'm Separating: Now What?

Nothing here replaces tailored legal advice. It gives you a practical map of what usually happens in Victoria.

Children come first, always

Australian family law puts children at the centre. Not parents. Not fairness between adults.

There is no such thing as “custody” anymore. The law talks about parenting arrangements.

What the law looks at

Courts and lawyers focus on one main question: What is in the child’s best interests?

That breaks down into a few core ideas:

• children should have a meaningful relationship with both parents
• children must be protected from harm, including family violence, neglect, or exposure to conflict
• children need stability, schooling, healthcare, and routine
• children’s views matter, more as they get older

Equal time is not automatic. Shared care only works if parents live close, communicate well, and manage handovers calmly. Many families move to arrangements like week about, long weekends, or one parent having the school week.

Do we have to go to court?

No. And most families do not.

Parents are expected to try family dispute resolution first, unless there is risk or urgency. This usually means mediation with an accredited provider.

If an agreement is reached, it can be written into a parenting plan or formalised through consent orders. Consent orders make the agreement legally binding.

Court becomes an option if agreement fails or safety is at stake.

Child support is separate

Parenting time does not decide child support.

Child support is handled through Services Australia or by private agreement. It depends on income, care percentage, and the cost of children.

You can agree on child support between yourselves. You can also ask for a formal assessment.

Property division, what gets split and how

There is no automatic 50/50 rule.

Australian family law uses a structured approach that looks at the whole relationship, not just whose name things are in.

Property includes:

• the home
• investment properties
• superannuation
• savings
• debts
• businesses
• vehicles
• inheritances
• redundancies received during the relationship

It does not matter whose name is on the asset.

The four-step approach

Most property settlements follow this sequence.

1. Identify and value the property pool

Everything owned by either of you, at separation or settlement, goes in.

2. Look at contributions

• Financial contributions like income, gifts, inheritances.
• Non-financial contributions like renovations or managing finances.
• Homemaker and parenting contributions count highly.

3. Consider future needs

This includes age, health, income gap, care of children, and earning capacity.

4. Check that the outcome is just and fair

This final step acts as a safeguard.

Each case turns on its own facts. A long relationship with children looks very different to a short relationship without them.

Superannuation is included

Super is treated as property. It can be split even if only one person has it.A super split does not mean cash in hand now. It moves money between super funds for later life.

Time limits matterIf you were married, you have 12 months from divorce to finalise property and spousal maintenance.

If you were in a de facto relationship, you have 2 years from separation.

Missing these limits creates serious risk.

Do we need a lawyer?

Some couples resolve everything themselves. Many start that way and then get stuck.

A lawyer helps by:

• explaining likely outcomes
• flagging red flags
• drafting documents correctly
• protecting you from informal deals that fall apart later

Early advice often saves money, not adds to it.

Practical next steps

• Write down important dates: start of the relationship, when you started living together, marriage, children’s birth date, when you separated.
• Gather documents: bank statements, super balances, property details.
• Keep communication about children calm and child-focused.
• Avoid big financial moves without advice.
• Make a new will. Until you are divorced, your spouse / partner may be entitled to your estate even if you are separated.
• Get legal advice early , even if things feel amicable.

Separation reshapes your life. Good advice helps you rebuild it on firm ground.

Make an appointment to speak to us.